is there any other torture in the world than a Monday?

I used to love Mondays. I'm not sure why. It may have been the fact that I used to have Mondays off, so that Tuesdays were really the most loathsome day of the week, but Mondays are back with an attitude, and I'm stuck at a desk all day.

I convinced the whole of my office to leave for lunch so I'd have atleast an hour of peace and quiet. It makes you think of a little older woman standing on her front porch, pushing her kids outside.

"You kids get out of the house now.. I have to watch my stories.... the Days of our Lives is coming on, and you know I need to know what happens to Bo and Hope today..."....

Even though you, your siblings, and even MA all know that tomorrow's episode will recap atleast 55 minutes of the 60 minutes that happened today, but those 5 integral minutes will be cut out, and Ma will have a small heart attack if she doesn't know who the father of Hope's baby really was (it was Bo, but we wont tell her that).

So the office is gone, I've eaten my home made pizza, which I reheated in our crafty little mirco-oven in the back copier area, and I'm now subjecting myself to a large glass of water, one small coca-cola, and a couple twizzlers while listening to extremely loud country music, and reading through CNN online.

Mondays are in fact that worst around here. It seems that everyone is actually in attendance on mondays.. and mondays ONLY. The rest of the week, there's kind of an ebb and flow of people here (sans wednesday morning from 9 am to 10 am, when we have a mandatory office meeting, then people leave).

The thing about my job is, well, if there are tons of people here, I don't get anything I set out to do, DONE. Everyone is setting things on my desk as if their lives depend on it. My general thought pattern, though I don't say these things, goes a little like this most days:

"NO.. you do not need that marketing flyer done today, your client doesn't really care, you're just setting it on my desk so it's not on your desk."

"What the hell do you need another 3 mile radii aerial over Summerlin for, didn't you just get one of these from me yesterday to 'drive the site', what did you do with that one, eat it?"

"I take that back, you haven't eaten in weeks you scrawny thing, you obviously have no brain, I'll take pity on your blond self, here's ANOTHER aerial of the same site. Go get lost again."

"Are you even an agent here anymore? I never see you around. You only seem to pop into my office when you need something, like that tour package you set on my desk 24 hours before you needed it finished. That was fine. What the hell do you want now?"

Oh the bitterness, I know. This is the only job where I think I'll ever get this bitter. Though most of my other jobs I've been slightly tainted by the theory of people being needy, this job makes me feel as if grown men and women really are children when put in a small space together for long periods of time.

Mondays... the epitomy of all evil. Just crawl back into bed if you're just waking up. There is no need to even face Mondays. When I have my own business, we're going to be closed on Mondays.